see ya, 2009!

kyren turns 100

today was the 100th day of NICU life for us... and for our precious little miracle boy. and now that the end is in sight-- it really hasn't seemed that long. it's just become 'what we do'. of course i have my mom five minutes away from the hospital, a 19 month old who adores her, and an opportunity almost everyday to take a nap if i need one. add to that the fact that kyren has done SO well, and come so far, with such minimal complications-- really, it's been a relatively easy journey compared to what many people go through. we are blessed beyond belief to have such fabulous hospital care, insurance, working cars, a warm home, plenty of baby clothes, amazing family and friends, and a church community who are lining up to bring us meals for as long as we need them, starting the day he is discharged! REALLY, what more could we ask for???

beautiful boy

motorcycle man

One of Christian's favorite Christmas presents is his "Motorcycle" hat and jacket. A gift only a great grandparent would purchase...
That is what we called them to get him to try them on, and once he imagined himself as a real motorcyclist, there was no changing it.
He begs to wear them both, and doesn't want to take either of them off. At one point, driving in the car I turned around to look at him and said, "Hi Motorcycle Man!" -- which apparently he really liked, b/c he continued to repeat that phrase over and over and over again until we reached our destination. I'm sure these won't be the last pictures you see of Motorcycle Man:


It's hard work imagining to ride a motorcycle all day!

This is how he greeted me this morning when i walked in his room!

Christmas pictures

Waving "Hi" to Kooey (not trying to hit him)

Showing Kooey his new lion from Grandpop

Helping already!

Giving Kooey his Hippo from the Johnsons

Tractor Boy!

"Drive a tractor... up high!"

sitting in the "pwow"

right before he fell out of the 'pwow'

A Christmas Morning to Remember

Christian got some pretty fun presents for Christmas. He loved them all, but was a little overwhelmed by the 'multiple gifts in one sitting' phenomenon. he would have done much better with one gift per day over the next month, i think. maybe we'll wrap them up again and do just that.
The greatest gift of all was the first meeting of Big Brother and Little Brother on Christmas morning. It would have gone a lot more smoothly if I hadn't made the BIG mistake of telling Christian that there were NURSES there. He started to panic when he heard the "N" word, remembering his most recent encounter with the nurse at the pediatrician's office. When we first entered the NICU and he saw them all standing there in their nursing uniforms, he started whimpering. When the nurse held Kyren up for him to see, and we asked him if he wanted to say hi to Kooey, he cried and said, "No...", fearing that somehow we'd tricked him into coming to get a shot. SOO SAD...
but after a few minutes, he calmed down and was able to sit with me and help give his baby brother a bottle... and a couple of 'high fives'. his tolerance for sitting in one place for more than a few minutes was about as good as we expected. he became much more interested in the machines that were beeping, and the other babies in the room (at one point he tried to go check one or two of them out, pointed at them, and said, "more Kooey's".
We got a few precious pictures-- none too award winning-- and a couple of videos that Dave is working on editing together. Hope to post them soon...
Meanwhile, Kyren is 5 lbs. 8.7 oz today, and took 70 mL (a new record) when he nursed this morning!! He tends to go through spurts of eating and then a couple days of sleepiness, and then repeats. Hopefully he'll start to wake up more this next week, as he turns 14 weeks (38 weeks gestationally) today. It looks like he'll end up going home over 6 lbs! Who ever woulda thought we'd make it to such a high number as 6??? So exciting! Definitely a miraculous way to start off a new year!

pride n joy

bursting with love for my big talker today.
he said some of the cutest things-- and made me melt more than a few times. i never understood the expression about 'loving someone so much it hurts' as much as i do now. no offense to my dearly loved husband-- but this kid has got me swooning. i can't imagine adoring another one the way i do him-- just being honest. i guess over time it will happen somehow.
he decided that running around in his diaper and socks was much preferable to wearing clothes today.
he has a little bus at gramsy's that he rides on all around the house. today he kept saying, "sis-chin drive the bus...up high!" over and over again. i finally turned around to look at him, and he was standing on it, bending over to steer. the cutest little nakey boy. i wish i'd gotten the camera.
at one point, he grabbed his latest friend, rafa (one of my old teddy bears), lifted the seat on the bus, and said, "look, rafa, nothing!" usually there is some kind of little toy or treasure stashed in there. but apparently today, it was empty.
we played our own version of "I Spy" out the window of gramsy/poppy's dining room. we called it "i see". we saw a lot of fun stuff. icicles, snow, driveway, bird bath, street, stroller, sled, mommy's honda... and somewhere in his mind's eye, a dumper truck...
he then picked up my cell phone, held it up to the window and said, "phone see geese...crows." we had just finished reviewing that the crows outside were not the same as geese.
when he accidentally found 'daddy' in my contacts list in my phone, and i hit 'end' so he wouldn't accidentally erase any numbers, he said, "tiny daddy...back." meaning, 'i want that tiny picture of daddy back!'
yesterday he had his first official haircut (after all of my failed attempts to neaten it up/butchering it), courtesy of our awesome friend Jennifer! well, today he was wheeling rafa around in his (seth's old) wheel barrow. he'd found a clothes pin, and next thing i knew, he was in the wheel barrow w/rafa, giving the bear a haircut. it was the cutest thing ever. and he assured me that it didn't hurt. he said, "kip hair rafa. kip, kip, kip."
and while i was changing his diaper, he informed me that poppy has a tanker truck, a gas tank, and a diesel truck, all in one long run-on sentence.
he's the energizer bunny these days when it comes to language. he's discovering how to put words together like crazy. it's so fun to be part of that world and to try to understand what's going through his mind at all times. i think i have a pretty good handle on it, but then he always finds a way to surprise me with another level of comprehension!
and this was all during what was supposed to be his naptime...which finally happened around 2pm. poor exhausted mommy needed a nap too.
he's also taken a big interest in climbing this week. he climbs up on chairs, saying, "kwime a wadder." again and again and again... his imagination is flourishing, and he likes to say that his stuffed animals 'see' and 'hear' things, and shows them things like the christmas tree, ornaments, etc... saying, "look, frosty, red ball!" then he'll report back to me: "frosty sees a red ball!!" "doggie hears a siren!"
he is becoming addicted to the cartoon Caillou, and requests them by episode title on Youtube. Among his favorites is 'Caillou's Road Trip'. So now when we're in the car, he pretends to be on "Christian's Road Trip". it's hilarious.
i just can't get enough of him. and every time he lets me hold him, snuggle him, or kiss him, i just want to bottle up those moments and breathe them in before they're gone. i cherish our final days together of his 'only child'-hood.
will post pics hopefully soon...

3 months, 5 pounds, and 12 inches of snow

tomorrow, kyren will be 3 months old, and this morning he weighed in at the long-awaited 5lbs! he gained 2 oz overnight to push him over the 5lb mark!
today was the first day in a long time i didn't get in to see him. we got a foot or so of snow! christian can barely walk in it and it's beautiful! we tried to go sledding in our side yard, but it was too deep and powdery to do much. dave tried to mat it down with some snowboarding practice, which christian loved watching. gramsy decided to brave the snowstorm and go to the hospital to give k a bottle. so at least he got some attention from a familiar face.
at one point we were sitting in the snow together (about all c could do all bundled up!) and he bent down to taste it. he swallowed and made that 'after you swallow' throat sound on purpose that we were practicing yesterday when we were drinking water. then he looked at me and whispered with a grin, "ice cream!" it was priceless!
i made a double ham and broccoli quiche, baked some cookies, and made candy cane brownies for a xmas dinner we're supposed to go to tomorrow night... we'll see what old man winter brings before then. it's supposed to continue snowing through the night with potential blizzard-like conditions. soooo maybe we'll be enjoying those brownies by the fire...
dave and i had a nice snowed-in evening with candles and A Charlie Brown Christmas. enjoying these moments of calm before our own 'winter storm' rolls in in just a few weeks... or less.
kyren is still off the cannula between feedings, and taking more and more of his food by mouth instead of tube. right on track for coming home by his due date.
we were musing tonight about what it will be like a year or 2 from now, the two boys being best friends and playing in the snow together. . .
time will fly at the same time it will seem like a long journey, i'm sure. just like it has these past three months. tonight, before bedtime, christian walked in the bedroom, looked at me and said, "hi mommy. how you doin?" as he rolled his ball past me. totally unprompted. never taught him that. he's growing up so fast already! pretty soon he'll be teaching kooey how to talk. :) he's very interested lately in his 'big brother' book... great timing, as i really think he's starting to understand the concept that kooey is soon going to be coming to live with us. ahh... the adventures have only just begun!

Away in a ... garage

christian is really into garages right now. or as he calls them-- "jew-ahj 's". when i got the cresh out this morning and put it under the Christmas tree, and told him the names of everyone at the scene and watched his little face, taking it all in, i couldn't stand how cute he looked. so serious...thinking about every new word he was hearing.
he liked the animals, and the fact that he could make them eat the 'hay'. he REALLY liked the little ladder that goes up to the loft. he put his foot on it and said, "sis-chin, kwime!" (christian climb). he gets very disappointed when he can't climb tiny little ladders. it's hilarious. he eventually settled for making the donkey climb the ladder, and as he shoved the cow into the loft, he said (as he says with every truck he plays with these days) "jew-ahhhhj". i kind of knew that was coming. i mean, the whole structure does kind of resemble a garage. i'm just waiting for his trucks, loaders, backhoes, et al to end up parked in there. i know, total sacrilege -- but you gotta admit... it's kind of funny that Jesus would be born in a jew-ahj.

Cannuless!

Dave and I walked in to visit kyren this morning and the nurse had just removed his cannula! He was breathing completely on his own for the first time in his short little 12 week life! It was amazing to see his entire face without obstruction (except for the feeding tube still in his nose). We didn't get the greatest pics, but will try to post some soon.
He did pretty well all day without the O2 boost, but when I called this evening to see if the NICU staff is allowed to accept homemade cookies (from a cookie swap tonight), the nurse mentioned that he was back on the cannula to help him out. He'd had a busy day!! Breathing is hard work! We are so encouraged by this monumental step-- considering where he was only a few days ago. We know it's all a process and will take time to wean him completely. But it made the 'end in sight' a little more visible. And it made him a little more human. Such a precious face! Can't wait to see it again tomorrow, and smother it with kisses.

muh-wiss

today, christian called me "muh-wiss" (Meliss).
i couldn't believe my ears! he was playing with the buckle on the back of his high chair, and all of a sudden started repeating over and over again, "Buckle, Muh-wiss!"
I kept asking him what he was saying, and he finally pointed at me and said, "Muh-WISS."
(my mom had called me "meliss" the night before... i guess he filed that one away!)
a few minutes later, i asked him if he knew what my name was, and he said "Missa".
i asked him who told him that. he said "gwamsy".
later this evening, i was in another room, and he ran down the hall looking for me, saying, "Muh-wiss go? Muh-wiss go?" (ie, 'Where'd Meliss go?')
and that was it. the rest of the day and night i was "Mommy".
it's a very bizarre feeling to have your child call you by your real name. Especially when you didn't know he knew it!

Thank God for Diuretics!

Probably not a post title you see everyday...
but we are thanking God for the invention of Diuretics. Kyren has been steadily improving in terms of his breathing over the past few days. When he arrived at Paoli a few weeks ago, he was on 1L of cannula oxygen flow. Last week they had to raise that to 2L because of his struggles to breathe. After a few days of being on the diuretics, he's now down to just 1/4 L! If he continues to do well over the next few days, he may be able to try going without the cannula between feedings! It's like he hit the 36 week mark (on Sunday) and became a new man!
He took an entire feeding yesterday while nursing! And late last night took an entire feeding from the bottle. His awake times are more alert and lasting longer and longer. He sits up in the baby swing they have in the NICU, and looks all around. And so far his temperment seems to be very mellow. He doesn't fuss much, at least when we're around. He's a lot like Christian was... taking in the world and rather content with it all.
There can still be down days, and the doctor says he still hears a little fluid in the lungs, but he's obviously improving steadily! Today the nurse said we should pray to "whoever" that he continues on this path. I know exactly Who we'll be praying to! And it ain't L. Ron Hubbard...

laughing all the way...

I told Christian about a month ago that he couldn't do something ... i don't remember what it was. But I must have said that only 'big boys' can do that. Ever since, every time I tell him 'no', he looks at me and says, "Big boys?" in the cutest, most innocent tone. He's been attempting to speak in sentences more and more, and i really should be writing them down. His longest and funniest one yet was the other day during a diaper changing time. He said, "No big boys eat diaper cream!" You can imagine how this statement came about. He often tries to take the tube of diaper rash cream and put it in his mouth. I tell him 'no eating diaper cream.' He says, "Big boys?" I say "no. not even big boys can eat diaper cream. in fact, no people eat diaper cream." (and since i will often tell him that only mommy or daddy can do something or other... he will respond to such a statement as "no people eat diaper cream" with, "mommy?"..."daddy?"...). So now we go through the whole list of people who don't eat diaper cream... i finally realized that he's probably smart enough to just learn the word "nobody". So now when it's time for a diaper change, he goes through the list:
Sis-chin no eat diaper cream.
No people eat diaper cream.
No big boys eat diaper cream.
Nobody eats diaper cream.

His other running joke: "Gramma Peg has a tanker truck"...(pause)..... "Nooo!"
This came about at the dinner table the other night, when we were telling gramsy and poppy that he'd announced that "poppy has a tanker truck" on the way to their house that day. we told him "Noooo...poppy doesn't have a tanker truck!"
what we failed to understand (as poppy quickly enlightened us), is that poppy does have a gas tank by his garage in the backyard, and he told christian about the big tanker truck that comes to fill it up. so he was partially right. poppy does have a tanker truck that comes to his yard. we stand corrected. somehow, the statement evolved into a big joke in his mind. and eventually gramma peg got dragged into it. not sure how. but it was one of the funniest things he's said, to date. and ever since then, he's been telling us little jokes, all ending in "Noooo!"
It's similar to when he pretends to put the shape in the wrong hole in the shape sorter, or the wrong letter in the alphabet puzzle, and says, "nope!"

Oh and tonight he was eating his alphabet tater tots, and turning them around so that they made more than just one letter at a time (ie, the "M" can be an "E", "3", AND a "W", depending on which way you hold it). we thought that was pretty ingenius, until he took the "I", and after discovering that it could also be an "H", held it up to his eye, and said "I" (eye), over and over and over.

Needless to say, he's keeping us entertained as we transition into Dave returning to work, Kyren having a few setbacks, and me still coping with some post-traumatic stress issues.
We are thankful for his wit and humor, and can honestly say that during this season, he is the one who keeps us laughing all the way!

Bubbles the Elf

water weight

They've decided to try to help Kyren's lungs by putting him on a diuretic. Last week when he was doing so well, the doctor was surprised that he hadn't ever been on one. So I guess it's pretty common for micro preemies to require it. Hopefully it will lessen the fluid in his system, and in particular his lungs, and eventually help him to wean from the cannula. But for now, his oxygen level and flow have both been increased to keep his numbers from plummeting. They've also added a 1/2 Tbsp. of rice cereal to his bottles, to try to help with the reflux issue. So far it doesn't seem to be making too much of a difference. Please pray for these things to be resolved, so that further medication, etc... would not be needed.
On the upside, his nursing and bottle feeding continue to improve (he took a bottle after nursing 2x yesterday, and didn't need to be tube fed for those feedings at all!), and I have gotten to see him wide awake the past few times I've been there. It's so adorable! He is very mellow, but very alert, and beginning to look around at the big world that surrounds him. He's getting cuter and cuter as his cheeks get chubbier and chubbier ... Though he may be losing a little weight over the next few days, as he sheds his excess fluids.
Speaking of cuteness, yesterday I brought in his "My First Christmas" sleeper, and it just about fit him! He looked like a little red elf :) ...figured he better get some use out of it before Christmas-- he may be too big for it by then!

one step back

We've been so encouraged by the steady progress of our little guy, we forgot about the potential of '2steps forward, 1 step back'. The past couple of days he's been having some issues with breathing. They aren't sure if it's related to being off of the C-PAP for a week or so, or if it's being caused by reflux. Maybe a little of both?
Please pray that they would figure it out quickly, and that his little body would get back on track. One step back isn't terrible, but it isn't fun to watch him struggle.
On the bright side, he is still gaining weight steadily, is up to 41mL per feeding, and weighs 4 lbs 9.5 oz this morning! He's also doing better and better with nursing and bottle feeding, though he is still tiny and gets easily tired out.
Dave finally got to visit him for the first time last night, and came home beaming. It was a precious reunion! We are nearing the end of his Paternity Leave, and are enjoying our last few days together-- introducing Christian to all of our family Christmas traditions.
It's fun to watch him discover the little joys of the season. He loves the snow-- and asks continually to go outside for "more sled!" And as much as we thought he'd love the process of going to pick out our Christmas tree, we didn't anticipate how much MORE he'd love the fact that we went to Home Depot (to get the tree). He ended up being incredibly interested in the forklift that was moving crates around the garden center... and couldn't have cared less about the tree search. His favorite part about putting the tree in our livingroom was the 4 screws on the tree stand. He crawled around and around it, saying "turn wheels" and trying to screw them all in. And while the lights and ornaments fascinated him for a few minutes, he took more joy in opening and shutting the flaps on the box in which they came. Ah, to step back and see the world through little (boy) eyes!
Perhaps we should take more 'steps back' this season, and really take time to appreciate the endless blessings we've been given. To be 'simply thankful' for our health, our home, our boys, our family and friends, our many provisions, and our basic freedoms. And most of all, our Saviour.
Thank you, Lord, for coming to show us true Love, that we might be able to fully enjoy this life, even with all of its hardships. Thank you for humbling yourself as a tiny baby, one Major step DOWN, to do what we could never do for ourselves. As we step back and look at the Manger, we are reminded of your sweet innocence, your holy purposes, and your commitment to being Immanuel: "God with us"-- A kindness we didn't deserve and so often forget is still true! Help us this year to ponder more frequently the reason for your appearance on that first Christmas morning... and allow the wonder of it all to bring our hearts to where they were meant to be. Thank you for being God With Us during this trial, and showing us, through Kyren, how sweet and precious this life is. We don't want to take any of it for granted!

one for the team...and one step at a time

Thank you for praying for our health as a family this week! Dave is on the mend (and on Z-pack), tho he is still coughing, and unable to visit Kyren. :(
Miraculously, neither Christian nor I have gotten ill!
So hopefully we are out of the woods, and Dave has taken one for the team.
Kyren continues to gain weight and is approaching 4 1/2 pounds already! He's up to 39 mL every 3 hrs, and if he nurses or takes a bottle before his feeding, they can weigh him before and after to see how much he's actually gotten, and subtract that from his tube feed. Technology! :)
They are beginning to talk about him coming home in the next month-- and it is all a little unnerving. I remember the doctor telling us the first day, that it would seem like forever that he was in the hospital, but when it was time to come home, we wouldn't be ready for it. It would be sudden, and we'd feel unprepared. And as I think about the reality of it happening in just a matter of weeks, he's right! All of the details, doctor visits, sleepless nights, etc... are overwelming to think about, on top of caring for a 19 month old!
I know that God has brought us this far, and isn't going to leave us now-- but it is still somewhat of a daunting task-- to go from having 24hr nurse care and monitors, to having us be responsible for this little being's overall health!
One step at a time. A whole new adventure is about to begin. And as challenging as this one has been, I want to enjoy every last moment of its peacefulness and 'freedom', before the next chapter unfolds!

Milestones galore

I got to give Kyren a bath today for the first time -- my first time, not his! He LOVED the water. It was so sweet to watch him, so alert and happy--looking all around and enjoying the womb-like feeling.

He is officially (hopefully for good) off the C-PAP, and doing really well! This means that in the next day or so, they will move his feeding tube to his nose, so that he can begin to suck better when he nurses or takes a bottle. But after today's nursing session, I don't think he's going to have much trouble either way! He is latching like a champ, and really getting the hang of it! I am thrilled beyond words-- it is such an amazing feeling to watch him get it!!! I'm so proud of him :)

We are also able to stop the "snoogle", which was getting tiresome for me to keep having to wash and wear in my shirt. Now that we're doing "Kangaroo Care" (skin to skin) everyday, he doesn't really need the snoogle to remind him of my scent. YAY!!!

We are on the fast track here-- and before we know it, this little guy will be home in our arms! It's unreal! Please continue to pray for his health and success with feeding. And that Dave's illness would get better (he's gotten worse :( ), and that the rest of us would remain healthy!!!

sleepy head

wide awake

Blurry, but i love it!

Mommy's first bath

presh

hi mom!

mmm, water!

clean and cozy

The nurses keep coming in to see him -- he's the tiniest baby there -- and it amazes me that anyone would remember me from the week I was in and out of Paoli with contractions, but apparently they do... some have even been following Kyren's progress (while at Lankenau) and come to see him now like he's a celebrity! We're trying to not let it go to his cute little head :)

4 lbs...

...and growing like a weed!
today was the first time they weighed him before and after nursing-- and it looks like he may have actually gotten some nutrition out of the deal! An entire 1/2 ounce! woo hoo!
we are so thankful that he is taking to the breastfeeding so quickly, and pray that it only continues to be successful! He is up to 36mL by tube every 3 hrs now, so he is still getting the vast majority of his milk that way... as feeding by mouth is very tiring for him. I keep reminding myself that he's technically not even supposed to be born for another 6 weeks, and anything we ask him to 'do' is going to be a chore at this point. But I am so proud of him. It is such a sweet moment every time he latches on, even if it's only for a few seconds.
Today I fell asleep with him, skin-to-skin, his head on my chest-- something I never even did with Christian. I must have been really tired, seeing as I was not only sitting up in a rocking chair, but there were people talking, and machines beeping all around us! It was awesome. I am cherishing these moments where it is just him and me. As much as we look forward to his homecoming, there is something about being able to fully focus on him and then go home and fully focus on my other little one that feels like a privilege. Having them both under the same roof, demanding my attention simultaneously, will be a different kind of privilege ;).

34 weeks

I can't believe it's only been 1 week since last sunday! It feels like we've been at Paoli a lot longer than that-- Kyren is doing so well and has come so far in such a short amount of time. He is back to 9hrs on the cannula, and hopefully will be rid of the C-PAP very soon, for good! He's nursed a few more times, learning how to suck and swallow a little more each day, and even took a bottle today on his first try rather successfully! Paoli is such a different place from Lankenau. Small, intimate, only a couple of other babies-- all in one room together. We are quickly getting to know our new nurses, and there are a lot fewer of them, so I have a feeling we will be getting to know them pretty well! It's exciting to see Kyren's cheeks everyday, getting chubbier and chubbier! By morning, he will officially have reached 4 lbs!

On the downside, Dave has finally fallen prey to a lingering sore throat/cold, and hasn't been to see the little guy since tuesday! Seems like forever :(.

Praying that the rest of us don't catch it. So far, so good!

We've been housesitting all weekend for my parents and are looking forward to getting home and hopefully more rested, as the dog (and that host of strange noises in the night) has kept us (well, me) up a lot.

Still, I lie here with so much gratitude in my heart, for all that we've been blessed with! I can't get over how amazing my boys are to me, and how much I love all 3 of them!

It's a wonderful season for thankfulness!

Our Thanksgiving Miracle

Ok, so maybe it's not a true Miracle, but it sure is a fabulous blessing this Thanksgiving Eve--
This afternoon one of the NICU doctors called to let us know that "the stars had aligned" for Kyren to be able to transfer to Paoli Hospital! We'd inquired about the possibility a couple of times over the past few days, and were told it was not something that typically could happen unless Lankenau's NICU was full, and Paoli's NICU was sparse (Lankenau has 20 beds, Paoli has 6). Paoli only takes babies 32 weeks and above. Kyren is 33, so he now qualifies. But it just so happened that between yesterday and today, Lankenau got full and Paoli had 2 babies discharged, giving them enough room for a more "long term" patient. And because Lankenau technically needs the space, it was considered a "necessary" transfer, meaning we don't have to pay for the ambulance ride, or anything! What a gift! As if this week wasn't already blessed enough! That is the lavish love of God!!
So now, instead of travelling 45-55 minutes each day, we only have to go 20. And my parents live 5 minutes from Paoli, so dropping Christian off there is not as much out of the way! AND we just so happen to be house sitting for them this weekend, so we'll be able to run back and forth as Kyren gets adjusted (ok, as we get adjusted).
And all of this as he is getting ready to learn to breastfeed. We are still in the 'getting familiar' stage (called non-nutritive sucking), but soon enough we will be practicing that sucking/swallowing/breathing skill, and it will be helpful if i can be there 2x a day to nurse! Not to mention the fact that Dave will be going back to work in a couple of weeks, and I will be able to leave Christian with my Mom while i go to the hospital, and can just run back there for lunch, etc... not leaving him for long periods of time!
While we're a little sentimental about leaving the nursing staff at Lankenau, we are more than happy to be closer to home! And we can always go back and visit.
The icing on the cake tonight (or maybe the gravy on the turkey?) was that Maureen was the nurse who got to do the transfer-- so we got to see her one last time and thank her for all she did to make us feel loved and cared for during this season of our lives. It was a bittersweet goodbye. And just one more little reminder that God knows all of the details and loves to bless His children with every good and perfect gift (James 1:17).
Can't wait to start this new chapter-- and to celebrate God's many blessings on our family tomorrow!! THANKSGIVING INDEED :)

suckcess!!!!!!!!

Once again, we were blown away by yet another milestone tonight! Since he's been enjoying his pacifier so much, and beginning to suck his fingers and root around, the nurses have been talking about introducing breastfeeding in the coming weeks-- so I didn't expect it to happen today!
When we arrived at the hospital tonight, the nurse said I could put Kyren to the breast and let him just become familiar with it. As I held him close to me, she said not to expect much-- he may just nuzzle. But no sooner had she finished her sentence, when the child latched on and began sucking like a champ! It was the most amazing moment-- bringing tears of joy to my eyes-- after having spent the past 2 months hooked up to a machine meant to simulate the very action that my baby was growing strong enough to perform! It was a precious gift from God, and I could sense Him smiling too as He answered my prayers!

The nurse kept marveling at his immediate success, and even exclaimed to the other nurses at how well he was doing!
he was only able to nurse for a few minutes before he began to get tired. It's hard for these little guys to learn how to breathe, suck, and swallow all at once-- especially since he's still getting the hang of those things individually. But the nurse's excitement alone was enough to tell me that this was an incredible first run!

I am so encouraged!!!! And I can't wait till tomorrow!

leap of faith

We took a little leap of faith and decided to allow Kyren to be vaccinated. I've blogged about this controversial subject in the past, when trying to decide what to do for Christian. We felt very uneasy getting all of his vaccines at once, and went back and forth a million times on whether to get any of them at all. I really don't like the idea of them all being given at once, with all kinds of mysterious ingredients and side effects. I don't worry so much about the Autism thing anymore, but there is something about the whole issue that still doesn't sit well with me.

But when you've got a preemie with so many hurdles to conquer from the outset, you kind of have to weigh your cons against your other cons. His fragile immune system would simply not be able to handle it if he were to contract something like Meningitis or Whooping Cough. And the fact that he's doing so well right now; gaining weight, breathing better day by day, and making his way to 40 weeks with tenacity; make it easier for us to lean toward vaccinating. It would simply be horrendous were he to make it through this season with flying colors, only to contract something preventable that could kill him.

With Christian, we prayed for health and had faith to delay the shots. With Kyren, we're praying for safety as we move forward in faith FOR the shots. I like that we have the freedom in this country to choose what we feel is best for our children. I especially like that what is best for each child is often discovered on an individual basis. And above all of these things, I like that God is in control of their lives, knows all things, and ultimately guides our choices and uses the outcome for good.

Praying over the next couple of days, as Kyren receives his shots, that he would have little or no side effects, and that his little body would be strengthened, not weakened in any way.

He is up to 9 hour sprints now on the cannula, and down to 3hrs. on the C-PAP!!!! He is no longer in his isolette-- he's graduated to a 'crib' (praying that his body temp will stay regulated)-- And this morning he is half way to 4 lbs! As well as 32 mL per feeding. We may be able to introduce milk by mouth this week!! (praying for that too!!!)

Let the Thanks-Giving begin!!

daddy wanna-be

Dave and Christian have really been able to bond these past 2 months-- especially since they share a love for art...
well, Dave is artistic, and Christian likes to demand that we draw things on the "Doodle Pro" (Magna Doodle)... and well, Daddy just draws better than Mommy. His favorites include loaders, mumbas, big rigs, forklifts and backhoes. And most recently, hands. This morning, they teamed up, and drew this together:



Then, C proceeded to run around the house like this:

unable to see where he was going
(i think he could still see the floor)

and everytime he removed the hat to make sure we were watching this spectacle, he'd look at us and say, "Daddy...Mumba Ride!" Which I guess is now the name of the hat. It, apparently, is the hat Daddy wears when they ride on the mower together... only, he hasn't ridden on the mower with Daddy for several months... he just has a really good memory.
:)

Happy 2 Month Birthday!!

Wow-- 2 whole months old!
I just keep marveling at how, if I were to have given birth to him today, we would still have a lot of concerns about his premature arrival. It's just amazing that he has been outside of the safety of the womb for 2 entire months, and should technically be in there for about 2 more........ and yet is doing so well!
There is talk of introducing him to milk by mouth next week! We are continuing to ask for prayer that this would go even better than expected-- and that the practice sucking that he's been doing on his pacifier would pay off! he really likes that thing (just like his brother), and that strong suck is a REALLY good sign that he's getting ready to eat for real!
He is also beginning to wear clothes to see whether or not his body temp can regulate on its own. Up until now the isolette has been warming him up so his body doesn't have to devote any extra calories to keeping warm. But now that he's growing and getting stronger, they are turning down the temp inside his isolette, and letting his body begin to acclimate. The doc told us the other day that the ability to regulate body temp is a major step to being ready to go home. So.... praying that he would continue to gain weight and maintain temp at the same time...
As you can see-- we are 2 proud and "expectant" parents!



Our first photo of the three of us!

Daddy gets to hold for the first time w/the cannula

sportin the muscle shirt... and those huge biceps!

a little primping for the camera

Stylin' Video

sprinting

I called Kyren's nurse this morning around 11am to see if they were in need of any more milk for this week before I made the 40 minute drive to the hospital. Before I could ask, she informed me that K was doing really well today and that she was trying him on the nasal cannula for a few hours to see how he did! ...And that he was doing GREAT!!! We were told that the C-PAP would probably be on for about a month. That was about 2 weeks ago! One nurse had told us it would feel like a long time, and we were prepared for a few more weeks of it. So the news that he was already ready to begin what they call "Sprinting" (where he has the cannula for a 3 hr. stretch and then goes back on the C-PAP for awhile before trying it again) came as a total shock. THEN she informed me that if I could get there before 1pm, I could hold him and see his beautiful face before he had to go back on the C-PAP for his feed. She'd given him a little bath and his hair was all fuzzy and clean, and his coloring was rosy and sweet. I could feel joy eminating from my face as i held him like a baby for the first time ever (i've only had him against my chest), and gazed at his perfect little features. He felt like a baby too-- all 3 lbs. 3.3 oz.! What a miracle! He was also wearing his first outfit ever-- probably the smallest they come, but still gigantic on him. I loved every second, and had my friend Jenn there to do a little photo shoot-- what more could i have asked for?!

these two pics were taken a couple nights ago, for perspective

his first little outfit, room to grow...

nuzzling his blanket

(something he's always tried to do but couldn't until now!)