6 Whole Weeks

We have loved every (well almost every) minute of our new life these past 6 weeks! There have been a few rough spots here and there-- usually having to do with not being able to get the little guy to settle down for naps-- ok, and some painful moments of learning how to nurse! But overall, this miraculous little blessing that has bombarded our hearts and lives is the most cherished gift we've ever been given! I am astonished this week at how much I love him more and more each day. I find myself forgoing meals while he's awake, just to watch him. I just can't seem to pull myself away. Just one more smile-- one more coo-- then I'll eat. But then I just want one more! I didn't know how addictive he'd be! For me to skip out on food is unheard of! (don't worry, i'm not forgoing altogether...)
We've started the process of helping him go to sleep on his own (he can't be walked around in the Ergo carrier {the best invention EVER--thanks Amy!} till he's 18... although listening to him scream his head off in his crib for 10 minutes rips my heart out every time! If there were a way to carry him till he's 18 without doing serious damage, I'd sign up in a second!)
i remember a friend telling me while i was pregnant how she wasn't prepared for how her baby's cries would "go right through her". i wasn't sure what that meant-- until now. it takes everything in me to go against my maternal fibers that yearn to run and comfort him. the urge is so strong, i sometimes have to leave the house.
but at the moment, i have a (peacefully) sleeping baby-- which has not been the case when walking him to sleep in the Ergo. As soon as we'd put him down, he'd wake up... hence the lack of blogging for the past 6 weeks. To actually be able to eat a meal or fold laundry or sit here and type is a breath of fresh air.
Yet this first step of helping the boy become independent is a bittersweet one! I guess it only becomes more and more so as the years progress. That's what makes every moment one i don't want to miss... even for a meal.